I LAUGHED HYSTERICALLY WHEN HE UTTERED THOSE WORDS “Please come again I don’t believe I heard you right” “I said you are 12 weeks pregnant, that’s what the results say” I instinctively touched my tummy and whispered Jamal’s name silently “Aye, so you should make an appointment with your doctor or should I recommend one for you”.

I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as I left the doctor’s office I’ve met with the gynaecologist who would now take over from the doctor and I was very happy when she turned out to be female, I sighed as I stopped a cab to take me back to the hostel, I don’t know how Elena is going to react when she finds out, the doctor she called the other day couldn’t make it and I felt better so I didn’t see any need to go see a doctor again, But I’d been noticing the weird changes in body lately like the late arrival of my menses, my menses never delayed not even for a day, so it was weird at first, and then the eating problem I ate too much, I could eat a whole chicken and not be full, I first blamed it on the weather maybe it’s all a change of weather, but I started freaking out on the second month but never mustered the courage to see a doctor, I was afraid this would be the results and now look, what I suspected finally turned out to be true.

I am three months pregnant, I had a life growing inside me the fruit of my love with Jamal “Oh Jamal” I whispered into the air touching my tummy again I groaned when my back ached and pushed myself into the chair “Are you ok ma’am” the cabbie asked in his thick Scottish accent crooking the rearview mirror to see me well “I’m alright sir thank you”. I alighted at the hostel when we got to  campus, I had two options now, hold on with my schooling for now and resume after I have given birth or school whiles I’m pregnant, I couldn’t just stop schooling no way so I had to school while I was pregnant.

Elena was not yet back from her expedition or whatever it was she said she was going to I wondered if I should tell her about my pregnancy, Hmm I looked at the ceiling like it could give me an answer, I had an evening lecture today, but it seems that will be going down in the drain cos my head is all jumbled and I don’t know if I’ll understand anything the lecturer teaches so that meant no lectures today.


I was awoke by the endless sounds from the kitchen “Elena… ” I groaned out and the sound magically stopped “Aaliyah you’ve been sleeping for over three hours since I arrived” she proclaimed widening her eye like it was the most mysterious thing to ever happen, I liked how she behaved it sometimes made me miss being a child I was never really a child, I had to learn to be an adult or should I say act like an adult before I even turned into one.

I told her about my pregnancy after I had prayed and had dinner and she was pretty amazed “You mean to tell me you are pregnant?” she asked widening her eyes like saucers. I told her half truths about Jamal and me. “Aw I’m so sad about how your story ends but I hope he sees reason to come back to you” I just smiled and begged her to stop talking about it cos I hurted whenever I remember what happened.


My pregnancy was luckily a smooth one I had no morning sickness and it was not so revealing even as  I entered my last trimester, I just gained lots of weight and my curves filled out  so I wore more loose clothes and Elena was very supportive we were not course mates but she helped me get notes  whenever I felt lazy to go for lectures, we only shared psychology class she studied computer science and psychology whiles I did (business management and psychology) and she was a genius at it I bet she will be the next best female programmer she is one of the best computer science students in Aberdeen which was a world class school.

I closed my eye really hard and pushed the book I had on my study desk away I pushed the chair back and went to stand by the window putting a hand on my small bump, all I craved now was to be held tightly by Jamal listening to his ever soothing voice sooth me to sleep I missed him so much and daddy too, I pulled out my cell phone but I stopped midway as I was dialling his number and used the land-line phone downstairs Elena has programmed it like a phone booth so calls couldn’t be traced she did it to pull prank on people the phone was answered on the second ring “Hello” I closed my eyes as his voice wash over me I really missed him “Hello” he said again “Please who’s on the line” I slammed the phone back on the dialler, and placed my hand on my chest as I willed my heart to regulate it’s beating, my heart pounded like it was going to come out of my chest.

I knew I will never be able to get over Jamal his love was tattooed onto my heart, so permanent I can’t  forget him even if I  willed myself to do so.


We were done with the exam within two weeks, I was very happy when we were given a long break. The doctor was very happy with my progress, things were running smoothly, my investment was paying off quite well and the baby will be arriving soon.

“So what do you say will you go with me?” she asked giving me a pleading look, “Ugh Lena I know your parents are very nice but I don’t want to be a burden on you guys, with this thing I have in front of me” I said pointing to my tummy. She looked annoyed when I said that “You didn’t have to insult my godson and he’ll never be a burden on me” the baby kicked like it knew what we were talking about I smiled and soothed my tummy as I made way to go lie on the bed. She opened the closet and took the trolley at the entrance of the walk in closet, she brought the luggage out and started stuffing my clothes in the bag, “Elena…” I groaned “stop that” “No Lil missy you’re going with me and you have no say in this” I rolled my eyes and closed my eyes I was asleep in a few minutes.






I bit my lip in pain but smiled nervously when Elena looked my way we’ve been in London for the past two weeks and I was very happy with the kind of reception her parents gave me she had two older brothers and they were all super friendly and tolerant, they didn’t mind that I was a Muslim and pregnant all that mattered to them was I was a good friend of Elena and automatically a member of the family, Mr and Mrs Banks treated me like a daughter and their sons Clayton and Jordan were my big brothers I really loved them.


She raised an eyebrow questioningly but I swallowed and smiled again I held the fork tightly and nervously chewed on the side of my lip, I winced and rubbed my hand on my waist what was happening to me I felt a cool liquid on my thigh and widened my eyes then screamed.


I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED AFTER THAT, I OPENED MY EYES, and blinked them repeatedly trying to remember what happened I instinctively touched my tummy and it was a little flat, did I have a miscarriage was my baby dead? I closed my eyes tightly and shook my head gingerly this couldn’t happen to us, a nurse entered the room and that was when I studied my room it was a private room I think cos I was the only one in the room.


She checked the needle and water that hanged on the metal pole, “how do you feel?” she asked coolly with a soft smile on her face “the doctor will join us soon” she added when I only nodded.


My throat felt too dry to speak, I wanted to ask about my baby, I was scared of the answer they might give me “M-my” my voice was so silent she wouldn’t have known I was trying to speak if she hadn’t been watching me, the doctor joined us just then.


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