IT’S BEEN TWO WEEKS SINCE I  CAME BACK HOME,  and my relationship with Steph has not improved in anyway,  I couldn’t muster the courage to tell him I’d slept with another man,  the jet lag coupled with guilt and the silent treatment I received from both mom and Nora was eating me up. 

Steph was getting fed up I could tell,  I’ve practically turned down all advances he’s made on me,  my conscience wouldn’t make me open up,  telling mom would be the worse mistake I’ll ever make,  with how furious she is now she won’t think twice before beating me to pulp,  Nora worked with Steph and she was also angry with me already,  she tends to act stupid when angry,  I can never tell if she’ll run to mom or Steph with the news after I tell her. 

I sighed in frustration and fell backwards on the bed almost  bumping my head on the headboard,  I’ve never deemed myself perfect,  I know I’ve always despised working and poverty,  I might have married Steph for the wrong reasons but the guy has supported me even when he was the one being treated unfairly by me. 

Not once has he ever complained on my spendings,  I don’t know the amount he stacks in my account but not once has it ever run out even when I went on the doomed voyage spree.

‘You knew that all along but still cheated on him’ the humane part of my conscience chastised,  I made up my mind then to tell him the truth,  he at least deserved the truth from me.

 This relationship has been one sided anyway,  the only time I showed him love was before marriage .
I rose from the bed and made way to the closet,  then stopped when I remembered everything there was bought by him.

God, mom never raised me to be like this she was a strong independent woman, she has worked day and night just so I’ll get a good education,  yet look how I’ve turned out. 

I walked to the bathroom and showered,  Steph was almost home I had to finish up before he came. 

I wore a simple knee length white dress, then took my phone,  there was no need for makeup or anything and the little balance I had on my mobile money account should be enough to support me for a few weeks. 

I frowned when I heard a car pull up at the lot,  Steph was home already I  had to get this thing over and done with. 
I held the banister looking down to the front door,  then started descending the stairs when I saw the knob turn. I made it downstairs before he came in. 

The house was quiet,  I went to the kitchen when I heard the thud of his shoes, the fridge was stocked up with soups and stews and occasional left overs,  I poured a cup of rice in the rice cooker to cook then took  a bowl of stew from the fridge to heat. 

Maybe he’d be more understanding after eating,  I heaved a sigh and went to the living room again, he had  gone upstairs then,  I sat on the couch contemplating whether  to follow him there then convince him to join me or just forget about the matter all together besides there was no way I could get pregnant.  
I looked around the house, admiring the architectural prowess of whoever designed it,  it might also  be the last I’m seeing it too.

I then went upstairs to the master bedroom.  He was lying on the bed with both hands covering his face.  I admired his handsome stature and wondered why I never fell for him like I was suppose to. 

I cleared my throat and smiled when he removed his hands  from his face. He seemed surprised but smiled back and patted the space next to him I shook my head and beckoned him to stand with my index finger,  I burst in laughter when he started twisting his lips sideways looking skyward like he was in deep thought. 
“To whom  does this humble servant hold the honor to be  visited by this beautiful angel”

“God Steph your food will get cold” I said a bit exasperated,  “And she cooked for me Hallelujah” he threw his hands in the air as if he was giving  testimony. 

I suddenly became saddened by his reaction, he is suppose to be angry with me,  I’ve never cooked for him.  “I only cooked the rice though” I felt the need to remind him as we made our way downstairs.

 I made him sit at the dinning area then went to the kitchen to bring the food. 


He might have felt me tense when he took the first bite,  he closed his eyes as he chowed the food moaning and nodding,  “will have to tell you this is the most delicious food I’ve ever tasted” I shook my head and chuckled: “at this juncture I know you are lying Steph I only boiled the rice and it was in the rice cooker,  stop exaggerating”  he chuckled and shook his head then brought a spoonful to my mouth “Come on ahhh” I smiled and opened my lips,  I wonder if he’ll be this way after I tell him what really happened. 


I came back and sat on the chair I was occupying after I’d finished washing the plates. 

Steph was typing something on his phone but placed it down immediately I took my seat. 

“Steph I’m sorry for all that I’ve made you gone through,  I’ve not been a good wife and ……”

I closed my eyes tightly when I felt a sharp pain in my abdomen,  my head started throbbing and my vision blurry . 
Lord if it’s my time to die, please grant me a little time to ask for forgiveness.


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